Archive for the ‘Off the (Beaten) Subway Track’ Category

The Hipster

August 13th, 2011 by Suzanne | 1 Comment | Filed in Asshole idiots, Damn, fun trips, hilarity, I love New York, Off the (Beaten) Subway Track, oh happy day, random, What is wrong with people?

For the last few years, I’ve meant to head out to Ft. Tilden, a former military base turned park in the Far Rockaways section of Queens.  A friend at work highly recommended it.  I finally semi-made it there today with Husband and some friends. 

Since my preferred method of travel, subway and/or bus, would have taken us about 2 hours, we decided to drive.  The park website had car directions, but when we arrived, we learned there was no parking without a permit in the summer.  Then, after ditching Augustus Gloop (our car) at the parking lot for neighboring Jacob Riis and walking along the concrete boardwalk back to Ft. Tilden park, we learned you cannot have a picnic there without a permit halfway through our picnic.  (The ranger let us finish, though.)

As came back from the trash after cleaning up, I passed by a woman sitting under a tree to my right.

“Hey hipster!  Go to the beach,” she hissed.

I looked behind me to see who she was talking to.  There was no one there.  I looked to my left.  Also no one there.  I looked back at her.  She had a straw hat pulled over her face so I could not see who she was looking at.

“Hey hipster!” She hissed again.  “Go to the beach!”

I realized that she was directing her comment to me.  This made me want to laugh, as I am about as close to a hipster as Snooki to a Greek scholar.  I wondered if she thought of all white people as hipsters, although I thought she was white, too.  She hissed at me a third time.  Then I felt awkward and weirded out.

The day was not a total bust, though.  After having our picnic rushed, not being able to use the hiking trail with the cool wood stairs, and being called a hipster, we headed over to the nearby Jamaica Bay Wildlife Refuge.  It was gorgeous and not even the osprey circling the air seemed to mind our presence.  Or maybe birds of prey like fake hipsters.

Good Bye, “Off the Beaten (Subway) Track”?

January 6th, 2011 by Suzanne | No Comments | Filed in Damn, I love New York, Off the (Beaten) Subway Track

The sales dude at the publishing house says it is not out of print. So that’s good…

If, by any chance, you or anyone you know would love a hard copy of Off the Beaten (Subway) Track, my book about unusual things to see and do in New York City, get it while you can. (The link is to Barnes & Noble, which still has some copies in stores. Borders does as well, and some museum gift shops may also.) Why the rush? I checked it on Amazon yesterday to see how sales were going (as I often do) and noticed that they no longer had any in stock. In the past when they were out, a notice appeared saying that more were coming soon. This time, it says you can order it for Kindle or from other sellers. The other sellers with new copies were charging over $100.

Fuck, I thought. It’s out of print. On the other hand, I guess it says something that it sold out of all copies in about two years. Not that I knew how many copies were printed in the first place. (The original publisher said they had no idea how many copies they printed. I suspect this is part of why they are out of business and had to sell the undetermined quantity to my new publisher.) Still, it had to be more than 2,000 based on my royalty statements. Which I haven’t received in over six months. Sigh.

When I saw my awesome lit agent friend at a reading last night, I asked her what she thought. She said that it was either out of print or nearly so. When she took a look at my contract, she also told me that I was in a no man’s land, as there was nothing about what happened to the rights of the book when it went out of print or if something available solely on Kindle is even considered to still be in print. I want(ed) to cry.

So, the cheesy sales pitch: Want to read a mostly funny, sometimes poignant account of the places I went and people I met while visiting 100 off the beaten track or unusual sites in New York City? Sure you do! Sixteen glowing reviews on Amazon (and one negative review that is actually a positive review, “…the book doesn’t really lay out general information and most of the attractions in the book are very odd” – yes, that is exactly what it said it will be about, so thank you for verifying it did) can’t be wrong! Buy your copy at a fine bookstore near you today! Don’t delay or the subway will pull out of the station without you!

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Public Transit Vacation

August 11th, 2010 by Suzanne | 10 Comments | Filed in fun trips, hilarity, Off the (Beaten) Subway Track

I proofread the penultimate version of Off the Beaten (Subway) Track on my way down to DC a few years ago. It inspired Maurice (the hamster that runs on the wheel that powers my brain) to hustle a bit. This led me to wonder how far I could go riding public transportation. Could I get all the way to Florida from New York City? Unlikely. Subsequent research stranded me somewhere in Maryland.

For no good reason, I pondered the subway/bus/commuter train idea this afternoon again. Could I get from Boston to New York City on public transit? How about Montreal? I was willing to walk ten miles if I had to do so in order to link a broken transit system and make it work. But what about my luggage? Would it endure?

Then I thought I could use some new luggage. If I mapped out some crazy trip, could I get a sponsor? Hey Samsonite! Would your toughest suitcase survive a several hundred mile trip using only public transit? Don’t you want to find out? Call me.

An airline could challenge me. Given all the bad publicity they have, I could demonstrate that people are still better off flying than taking public transportation as far as it can go. Another option is public transit authorities, but they are pretty low on funds these days. The US Postal Service already wastes their time on Lance Armstrong, but how awesome would it be to trust me with a sack of mail to be delivered in another geographic region via public transit? It would be like the pony express, only with less horseshit to deal with and more subway musicians singing off-key. Someone could outfit me to prove that their clothing really stands up to being worn five days in a row. I will try not to spill on my shirt.

I’m open to suggestions. This could be brilliant. It is sort of like “Eat. Pray. Love.,” but with granola bars and other snacks, praying that I don’t miss a connection that forces me to wait an hour for the next bus, and falling in love with a subway rat. (That would be Maurice’s love connection, not mine.) In the movie version, I will be played by Natalie Portman and Husband will be a Muppet. He’ll stand on the platform on 72nd Street as I board a 2 train to Penn Station and forget to wave me off with a white handkerchief because he’s busy using it to mop off the rivers of sweat cascading down his face. Seriously brilliant…

Cheers to Blogging and Shameless Self-Promotion

July 13th, 2010 by Suzanne | 6 Comments | Filed in Off the (Beaten) Subway Track, random, writing

Almost five years ago, I began blogging at CUSS. In that time, I also wrote for BlogHer (still do), Just Cause, Political Voices for Women, and The Panelist, plus personal side blogging projects, Theo Is America’s Next Top Model and my yogurt blog which had a good title that I can’t think of at the moment. (As part of my job, I sometimes also write for jspot.) While I could not maintain more than two regular writing sites, I found myself reflecting yesterday on how much I still enjoy writing on a blog. It juices me, and I think it makes me a better writer because these little posts let me play around with my ideas.

Because I like blogging so much, I’m jazzed to be part of a panel on how blogging can improve your writing at the BlogHer conference. Many people in my MFA program pooh-poohed blogging, but that is because they are snobs who believe that only people with their super literary tastes deserve to even read, let alone share their ideas and stories. I like that blogging not only jogs my writing, but also gives me a window into other people’s stories.

The panel is on Saturday, Aug. 7 at 10:45 am (I think). After it, I’ll be signing copies of my book about unusual things to see and do in NYC, Off the Beaten (Subway) Track. I didn’t write or publish my book as a result of blogging, but I did get a small (but very valued) audience as a result. Without blogging I also would not have the conference as a platform to sell my book, either. Blogging is great for writing.

Giddiness

May 27th, 2010 by Suzanne | No Comments | Filed in I love New York, Off the (Beaten) Subway Track, oh happy day

Instead of blogging while the Mets game is on in the background (and they are crushing Philadelphia just like that evil Phillies took revenge on another Phillies fan earlier this season by vomiting on his daughter), I should be folding laundry that sat in the dryer all night and washing dishes that sat in my sink all week. Actually, I should be sleeping. But I’m too excited. (I’m so excited that I even began a sentence with “but,” which I try to never do.)

This afternoon forward was glorious. I went to Book Expo America and signed copies of Off the (Beaten) Subway) Track. It was successful beyond my wildest dreams. Of course, my wildest dreams did not understand that to garner publicity and buzz, my publisher would give away my book so that people would mob me to get it signed. I thought I’d sit at the table and watch people walk by, not buy. (It seems giddiness also leads to bad puns.) How little I know about this mysterious world of publishing!

After the book signing, which ended after they ran out of books in 20 minutes, I recorded an interview with Sirius Radio. I was the last person the host of the books show squeezed in before closing shop. Then I wandered around the Expo for a little while, saw a mock up cover of another book about New York that I contributed to, and picked up a few free tchochkes. Best of all, at the L. Ron Hubbard publishing booth, I got two free pieces of individually wrapped, reduced fat Cabot cheese from people dressed like pirates. (Oh how I wish I had a photo of that.)

To cap off the day, I traveled up to the Bronx to tape a 30 minute interview for WFUV’s (which I keep initially typing as WFUC…) Cityscape program. It was a lot of fun. The episode will air on Sat., June 5. From there, I went to a cocktail party hosted by my publisher. Today was the first time I met my publisher’s staff, and they rocked. Talking to them really inspired me to get out there and do more to promote the book.

In addition to meeting awesome people, observing the purple-clad Scientologist pirates, and taping radio interviews, I also ingested large quantities of pastries, cheese, and Diet Coke. Husband is returning from a business trip tonight/in the wee hours of the new day. A three day weekend looms, and the weather report literally shines on me. It is good times.

Some Good News for “Off the (Beaten) Subway Track”

May 25th, 2010 by Suzanne | 2 Comments | Filed in I love New York, Off the (Beaten) Subway Track, writing

Other than Husband’s hilarious emails to Steph, things have been kind of grim here on CUSS. I’m excited to say, though, that I’ll be signing Off the (Beaten) Subway Track on Thursday from 1:00 – 1:45 at Turner Publishing’s booth at Book Expo America. Then at 6 pm, I’ll be in the Bronx recording an interview for the June 6 episode of Cityscape for WFUV. (I love that when I googled WFUV I accidentally typed wfuc and the radio station came up anyway.) I love talking about New York City and unusual things to see and do. It should all be lots of fun.