Archive for the ‘evil’ Category

Tattling

June 6th, 2011 by Suzanne | 1 Comment | Filed in Asshole idiots, evil, fuck, I love New York, other rants, What is wrong with people?

Dr. H and I were walking up 8th Avenue, chatting about the high and low points of “The Hangover Part II,” which we had just seen. As we crossed 42nd Street, a bus shot in front of us. It had made a reckless left turn and almost plowed through a crowd of people.

“HEY! WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?” I yelled.

“What are you fucking doing?” screamed the guy next to me.

All five of the people who were nearly mowed down made similar comments. The bus driver never even looked at us. It was scary.

As he sped west on 42nd, I made a mental note of the phone number written on the back door. (It’s 201.945.0556, in case anyone is interested.) Once I was safely on the sidewalk, I fished out my phone and tried calling the bus company to complain about their lunatic employee, but – shocking! – no one answered. Dr. H and I discussed how upsetting it was to nearly be run over and how little the driver cared.

A block later, I noticed two cops standing on the sidewalk.

“Maybe I should mention it to them,” I said to Dr. H.

“What good would that do?” she replied.

“None, but I want to anyway.” I thought I would feel better if I vented. And these happened to be super cute po-po. I felt that it might soothe my raw nerves to chat up some nice looking dudes. As expected, there was nothing they could do, but they weren’t surprised. They knew exactly what I meant.

When we walked away from the cops, Dr. H and I chatted about how hot they were. It made us giggle a lot and feel better.

Sad, I know.

Long Shorts with Pockets, Please

April 27th, 2011 by Suzanne | 5 Comments | Filed in Asshole idiots, Damn, evil, fashion Suzanne-style, other rants, random, What is wrong with people?

Dear Women’s Athletic Apparel Manufacturers:

I appreciate that you understand that women should be active and earn your livings by producing clothing to enable us ladies to engage in physical fitness. However, what is wrong with you? Most of you seem to produce clothing for men and women, and of course, the men’s gear is a jillion times better.

First off, almost all shorts made for men have pockets. You seem to understand that men carry shit with them – like keys and ID and money and music machines and maybe even inhalers or tissues – when they run. Guess what? Women need those items too! Especially asthmatic ones! Those little “key pockets” are nice for a key, but otherwise they are fucking bullshit. I need to carry my inhaler with me, just in case. Where shall I put it in your pocketless shorts?

This brings us to the length of shorts. Men’s shorts come in a variety of lengths, from the short running kind to straight legs that extend to their knees. Women’s shorts, on the other hand, come in two sizes: short and even shorter. It’s not just that I look atrocious in these items, although that is bad enough. The bigger problem is that my fat thighs do not appreciate the lack of fabric between them. Chafing. Fucking. Hurts. Sure, I could go out and buy a separate pair of somewhat longer spandex shorts to wear under the running shorts, but why not just make longer shorts? I don’t wear Spandex because I hate having anything too tight on while I am sweating, particularly in my cooter region.

Speaking of tight, why is every damn piece of clothing “semi-fitted?” I like to be able to breathe and let the air cool me down. I don’t need Dry-Fit or Dry-Weave or whatever fabric clinging to my sweaty body. Nor do I love that these “semi-fitted” shirts do not flatter my tummy bulge. I just want something nice and loose. Guess who has that option? Men! Can you please extend me the same courtesy?

Thanks for listening. I suspect that there are a lot of women out there with these issues. If you take up some variety in styles and add pockets, you might make some more money. It’s a win-win situation.

Sincerely,

Suzanne Reisman

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Repenting

April 21st, 2011 by Suzanne | 3 Comments | Filed in Damn, evil, fuck, hilarity, I love New York, Jewishness, mortification

That little joke I made yesterday (but somehow did not publish to my blog until a few minutes ago) about eating lobster rolls over Passover? I am definitely sorry. It was not funny to joke about endangering my soul, although I am not going to lie: I really, really wanted a lobster roll for dinner. (Instead, I ate a crisp bread sandwich of herbed turkey and cheddar – not exactly kosher for Passover, either, I know – and plain microwave popcorn.)

Now that I have semi-repented for my sacrilegious ways, I hope that the plagues will stop raining down on me. Last week I developed an annoying rash which continues to annoy me (the allergist thought it was a mild case of hives). Husband and I were forced to kill to water bugs/roaches on Sunday. This morning the third plague revealed itself.

I swore that I saw something dash from the kitchen pantry under the stove while I made breakfast, but was not sure if it was a shadow, a figment of my imagination, or something small with multiple legs. Regardless, it would not hurt to put out more MaxForce insect killer, I decided. When I opened the pantry door, I was surprised to see shredded parts of a bag of pita chips on the ground.

“That’s odd,” I thought as Maurice the Brain Hamster began running faster on the wheel that powers my brain. “Roaches don’t tear things up…”

Right. As I picked up the bag of pita chips (something that does not belong in my home over Passover anyway), I surprised the little gray mouse nibbling on a chip behind it. We both screamed (OK, I screamed loud enough for both of us), and he/she ran out of the pantry under the stove while I stood in place screaming.

The irony of this Passover plague saga is two-fold. First, if I had cleaned out the chametz, the mouse would not be eating it. I suspect the mouse would starve to death because matzah and other pre-packaged Passover foods are gross. Second, when Husband and I attended a lovely Seder on Monday night, someone shared a story of finding a mouse stuck on a glue trap in her apartment and how awful it was. Of course I thought that I was glad that I never had had to deal with mice. Of course.

I don’t even want to know what comes next.

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Plagues

April 17th, 2011 by Suzanne | 4 Comments | Filed in Damn, evil, fuck, hilarity, I love New York, Jewishness, mortification

Passover begins Monday night at sundown. During Passover, Jews celebrate our liberation from slavery in Egypt. Last year, I wrote about how my family observed Passover when I was growing up, and I spent some time exploring the ten plagues: (blood; frogs and lice; flies and dead livestock; boils and hail; locusts and darkness; and the death of the first born. After the tenth plague, Pharaoh more or less really let the Jews free, except that he changed his mind, had his troops chase them to the Red Sea, and they wound up drowning.

Today, however, two plagues seem to have struck my home. First, I broke out in an insane heat rash a few days ago. The itchiness is killing me. I’ve been using generic Benadryl, which helps, and smearing cortisone cream over my body as though it were sunscreen. While I’ll gladly take the rash over lice and/or boils, it is still really unpleasant. Nothing but cold showers for me in the foreseeable future. Ugh.

Then Husband and I were visited by the six-legged plague of many a New York apartment, and I am not talking about locusts or flies. As I rubbed cortisone onto my back, I heard Husband scream, then seem to stumble. I ran out of the bathroom and found him pressing his shoe into the ground? “Did you trip? Are you OK?” I asked. “No, there’s a roach!” he yelled. A ginormous waterbug had run across the hallway. “Get a paper towel!”

The problem with one roach is that there is never one roach. We sprayed raid, I spread more Maxforce gel, and replaced old bait stations with new ones. Then I scratched my itchy skin a lot. We didn’t have to wait long. Husband yelled and I smashed the vile critter with an empty Kleenex box.

Whatever I need to do, I will do it. Just end these plagues and don’t send more my way!

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Louise Was Right

March 9th, 2011 by Suzanne | 10 Comments | Filed in Asshole idiots, evil, fuck, mortification, other rants, sadness, What is wrong with people?

Again, this is why I should not read the newspaper while eating breakfast. Vicious Assault Shakes Texas Town read the headline in The New York Times. “Students Among 18 Arrested in Gang Rape of 11-Year-Old.”

What’s enraging is that the headline is not the worst part of this story. The suspects range in age from middle school students to 27 years old. According to The Times:

Five suspects are students at Cleveland High School, including two members of the basketball team. Another is the 21-year-old son of a school board member. A few of the others have criminal records, from selling drugs to robbery and, in one case, manslaughter.

Of course, they made at least one video while raping the girl. Another student received a copy on her cellphone and showed it to her teacher. That’s when the town was shaken. As one woman told The Times, “It’s just destroyed our community. These boys have to live with this the rest of their lives.” (Emphasis mine.) Yes, her sympathy lies with the rapists. Oh those poor boys who hung out with grown men with criminal records and raped someone! They can’t go to school now.

Really, it isn’t their fault, others said. The girl was asking for it. She “dressed older than her age, wearing makeup and fashions more appropriate to a woman in her 20s. She would hang out with teenage boys at a playground.” The same woman wringing her hands about the boys’ future reminded readers that it was as much the girl’s mother’s fault as anyone’s. “Where was her mother? What was her mother thinking?”

What I would like to know is this: who the fuck raised these boys to think it is OK to hang out with older men, kidnap girls (or women, for that matter), and rape them? If the girl’s mother is a bad parent, what about the member of the school board whose 21 year old son participated in raping and videotaping? What about the parents of the middle school students who let their sons hang out with men in the same age group the girl seems to have spent time with?

Another woman said, “I really wish that this could end in a better light.” A BETTER LIGHT? Really? A person was fucking gang raped and she is worried that the incident end in a “better light?” What kind of light would be better? That we find out the girl actually hypnotized the boys and men and tricked them into raped her and videotaping it? WHAT THE FUCK?

I’m so angry I can’t sit still. Twenty years ago, the movie “Thelma and Louise” came out. In it, one woman is about to be raped outside a bar after dancing with a male patron and drinking with him. Her friend tells him to leave the woman alone, and when he tells her to fuck off, she shoots him. The movie hints that she was raped a long time ago in Texas and nothing happened to her rapist because “she asked for it.” I guess things still roll that way in Texas. Even if you are eleven.

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Expirations, or Let the Past Be the Past

February 21st, 2011 by Suzanne | 1 Comment | Filed in Damn, evil, other rants, random, those were the days

Once again, I have a cold. I took NyQuil a few nights ago to quell the symptoms so I could get some sleep, crucial to a speedy recovery. I noticed that the bottle indicated that it expired in April 2005. I threw out another (unopened) bottle I found in a storage container that expired in 2001. Ditto a box of Immodium AD that saw its useful life end in February 2008.

No matter how hard I try to keep up with the present, it seems that the past exerts itself. In addition to our various old medications, I am surrounded by outdated ideas. Husband and I went to a cheese tasting and class last week. One of our classmates asked the instructor what the difference between pasteurized and raw milk was. I braced myself while she explained that the government liked to make decisions for people that really overreached to promote “safety.”

“See, when you get your dairy from small family farms that you know well, it should be up to you whether to take the risks or not,” she said.

Of course, the vast majority of people in this country are not intimately familiar with farms for a variety of reasons. Further, pasteurization laws were created exactly when most farms were small and family-run. This was no assurance that the food that people received was safe, or even food at all. Even the best intentioned farmers may not have had the knowledge or capacity to ensure that bacteria and other harmful agents did not infect their products. People got sick and died. That doesn’t factor in the farmers who just wanted to make a quick buck. A series of scandals involving milk thickened with other agents that killed people occurred. Food safety laws came into being for a reason. It’s not just the evils of corporate farming that they protect us from. History, conveniently forgotten like my bottles of NyQuil, show us that these laws saved people, particularly children.

Another good lesson that is rotting away is that of unions. It is true that many unions have gotten as powerful and lazy as the industries they counterbalance. However, unions rose out of the same corporate powered atmosphere that we live in today. They gave workers a voice and ensured that people could work in safe conditions and make decent livings. As unions have, overall, lost power in the past two decades, many of those protections have eroded. Now we again have corporations making huge profits while laying people off, claiming that they are good for everyone. We have politicians trying to use armed force to make union members regret standing up for themselves. While we blame government unions for every problem under the sun, the private sector laughs its way to the bank. They can buy all the fresh NyQuil they want.

The rest of us, forgetting our lessons and supporting this race to the bottom, will have to make do with the expired and potentially tainted products that are left over. We need to throw out the bad medicine. It won’t cure our ills.

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Sales

February 18th, 2011 by Suzanne | 2 Comments | Filed in Asshole idiots, Damn, evil, fashion Suzanne-style, hilarity, I love New York, mortification

All week long, I looked forward to running in the park today. My plan was to push myself a bit and do a 10K. I did two short runs at my parents’ house on their treadmill earlier in the week and a strength training session on Wednesday morning. My muscles were ready. I was psyched.

Then my throat started hurting around 4 pm on Wednesday. I wondered if it was because I was watching “Jersey Shore” and making me sick, but then I remembered that my mom had a sore throat on Tuesday and my sister had a cold over the weekend. I was sick. I hoped if I kept it quiet on Thursday (which was another day that would have been perfect to run) I’d feel better by today. Not so.

I woke up miserable. I moped around the apartment cursing the gods for inflicting me. I knew that I would wind up eating approximately 14 pounds of pretzel M&Ms if I stayed in all day. My mobile phone alerted me to a text message. My friend wanted to know if I would face off against the bridezillas at the annual Filene’s Basement bridal dress sale with her. I accepted. There’s nothing like a sale on items I absolutely do not need to cheer me up.

We met at 11:30, as she heard that the mob dies down by 10. It was still crowded and dresses were flung about everywhere. These shoppers made wild packs of dogs look calm. I don’t think more than two women in the store said excuse me as they shoved past me in the aisles. Women came in teams, with brides wearing t-shirts that read “BRIDE” in puffy paint and her friends in coordinating colors or hats or scarves. Women also ran around in their various special gown undergarments, as fitting rooms were not available. Brutal! My friend did not find anything, unfortunately.

On my way home from the Running of the Brides (I think that is the official name of the event, as Filene’s was selling t-shirts that said “I survived the Running of the Brides at Filene’s Basement”), I noticed a sale rack outside the Super Runners Shop. I managed to get a pair of Brooks worth $130 for $39.99, so that made me partly happy. It also frustrated me because I wanted to use them right away. Ce la vie.

My last sale score was a pair of running pants with zippered pockets. They were 20% off. I would have bought them full price, though, because I have noticed that women’s running pants no longer come with pockets. This makes it difficult for me to carry my inhaler, which is pretty essential to my ability to stay alive if something goes wrong.

Then I came home and found out that the House of “Representatives” passed a bill defunding Planned Parenthood’s cervical screening, STI treatment, and pre-natal care programs, along with the community development fund and public housing capital fund. To celebrate our descent into a third world country, I ate approximately 14 pounds of pretzel M&Ms.

Blood Libel

January 12th, 2011 by Suzanne | 16 Comments | Filed in evil, Jewishness, mortification, What is wrong with people?

I planned to write a lighthearted post today about using pliers to zip things. That story will have to wait. I was very upset this weekend by the shooting that took place in Arizona, but a lot of people were writing about it, and I didn’t have anything to add to their poignant and thoughtful – and yes, sometimes, angry – words.

Then Sarah Palin released her video statement. I’m not going to pretend that I watched it; I didn’t. I did not not watch it because I was sick of the people who take no responsibility for their words and actions accusing people like me of taking no responsibility for our words and actions. I didn’t watch it because someone told me that Palin claimed that there was a blood libel against her.

It’s hard to write this because I’m so upset that I’m crying, and the tears are obstructing my vision and my nose is running and it’s a mess. Blood libels have been used against Jews for centuries in Europe. They are accusations that Jews (or in some cases other minorities) kill Christian children to use their blood for religious reasons. They always led to extreme violence against Jews. They were always strummed up by high powered authorities as ways to incite mobs and let them feel justified in murdering and maiming. Almost always a blood libel conveniently was manufactured by officials when they needed to get pressure off of themselves for their failures and blame others. The insidiousness of blood libels touch multiple levels of human failure.

One of the most recent and infamous blood libels took place in Kielce, Poland in July 1946. When police/government officials/local citizens manufactured a story about a missing Christian boy, a mob – comprised also of police and government officials – rampaged. About 40 (out of the 200 Jews who managed to survive the Holocaust and return home) were killed and dozens of others injured. Around that time, my grandfather had just returned to Poland from Russia, where he had been since 1940. In August, he left Poland forever, taking my bubbe and father across the Czech and Austrian borders illegally so they could live in the relative safety of Austrian DP camps.

In the last few years, many people have accused people they disagree with of acting like Nazis. Recently, Glenn Beck claimed that Holocaust survivor George Soros was a Nazi. In the last decade, people who disagreed with George Bush’s (admittedly bad) policies compared him to Hitler. Now of course, people are claiming that Obama is another Hitler.

When we allow this speech, we denigrate history. We say that run-of-the-mill disagreements and policies that we think are bad are tantamount to genocide. Worse, in cases like Sarah Palin or Glenn Beck, we allow demagogues to misappropriate history, using it against the people who were hurt by it, painting the victims as perpetrators and the perpetrators of violence as victims. This is sick. No, it is beyond sick. It has to end, but I don’t think it will. And that’s why I’m crying. Because I don’t know what to do.

The Archbishop and the Arch Conservative

January 7th, 2011 by Suzanne | No Comments | Filed in Damn, evil, other rants

Almost every morning, I ruin my breakfast because I read the newspaper while eating. The obvious lesson is to stop reading the newspaper while eating breakfast, but I’d just ruin something else – like my lunch or dinner or afternoon break – if I postponed it. Perhaps the solution is not to read the paper at all. Ignorance is bliss. (I think this is at least 50% of why I feel better when I am on vacation – no reading of news…)

This morning, I came across a disingenuous article about religious leaders (primarily, in the article, the Archbishop of New York) saying we need to lower the abortion rate in New York City. There is no mention, of course, of the Catholic Church’s opposition to using birth control – including condoms. If there’s one thing that would absolutely help lower the need for abortions it is accessible, affordable birth control options and proper education on how to use them. But the Catholic Church isn’t into that.

Nor is the uber conservative rich dude who sponsored the forum at which religious leaders could pretend that their practices do not in any way, shape, or form lead to the need for abortions. Sean Fieler plans to spend millions to support and open evil pregnancy “counseling” centers to lie to women about their reproductive options and the consequences of each choice. Supposedly they also give pregnant women financial support to carry pregnancies to term, but I find it hard to believe that they truly cover what it costs to have a baby. Do they pay for all the health care? Transportation to and from doctor appointments? Maternity clothes? Nutritious foods? Rent so that she can live in a healthy and safe environment? Unemployment when the woman can’t work? What if she is hurt by the pregnancy? Will they support her health and basic needs for the rest of her life?

Does Sean Fieler support child care subsidies? Welfare? Food stamps? Universal health insurance? Affordable housing? (At least Catholic Charities does support families with affordable housing, food and nutrition services, and child care, but since the Catholic Church – other than an awesome group of nuns – opposed universal health care, they have no right to say they fully support the lives of children and families, either.)

Of course, I suspect Sean Fieler, like Archbishop Dolan, thinks that women who can’t afford babies should just give them up for adoption. While adoption can be amazing and I know several families who have been able to benefit from this most generous act, it is a dangerous fallacy that every adoption has a fairy tale ending. Real counseling – not that bullshit offered by Fieler’s centers – may be required. In addition, the idea that there are zillions of people waiting to adopt any infant that comes along is ludicrous. Gross as it may be, people want healthy white babies. If that is not available, they’ll take a healthy Asian baby. The lighter the skin, the easier a baby is to adopt. And even if cross color adoptions are options, there are other long term consequences that must be addressed. Are Sean Fieler or Catholic Charities or any of the other religious “leaders” paying for those services?

No?

Then they need to shut the fuck up until they acknowledge the full range of consequences of carrying an pregnancy to term. Abortion may not be great – I would hope no one is ever in a situation in which she needs one – but there’s a reason so many women choose it. Ironically, it takes compassion to understand that.

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Complicity

November 14th, 2010 by Suzanne | 3 Comments | Filed in evil, Jewishness, mortification, other rants

My grandfather, whose family was murdered in the Holocaust, told me many times that he would never forgive Poland for what happened.

“But Grandpa,” I said at one point. “It was the Germans who were in charges of the Holocaust. Why are you so angry at the Poles.”

He was so angry as he answered that spittle continually flew from his lips. “The POles could not wait to get rid of the Jews,” he told me. He did not yell. He said it patiently, explaining to a naive young American girl what it was like to be surrounded by people who hated you. “The Germans would not know who was Jewish and who was not if the Poles did not turn them over. They used every opportunity to get rid of the Jews. They to this day deny what they did, how they helped. At least the Germans are honest about what they did to us.”

Of course, I now understand how simple part of this answer is. While certainly anti-Semitism raged in Poland before the war, there were many, many people like Zofia Kossak-Szczucka who overlooked their hatred of their Jewish neighbors because they hated the Germans more. There were countless others who helped because they were good people, like the organizers of Żegota, which was officially (albeit inadequately) supported by the Polish government in exile. People who might have helped did not do so because Poland was the only occupied nation in which anyone caught harboring or assisting Jews would immediately be killed, as would their families. It is hard for me to fault people for not endangering their families.

Yet my grandfather was also correct. Poland still, for the most part, refused to see how victims (and the average Poles were indeed horribly victimized the the Nazis) can also be victimizers. For every Pole who did the right thing, far more turned in Jews for nothing more than a bottle of vodka or as much as the Jews’ belongings. Citizens went out of their ways to harass Jews, even without Nazis around. The Polish underground resistance, Armia Krajowa, declared that those who turned in Jews would be branded collaborators and shot. (At least that was the official line, as many of the leaders of Armia Krajowa were anti-Semites who wanted the Jews out of Poland. The whole thing is morally complicated and tangled with contradictions.) I understand why my grandfather could not look beyond his own experiences.

What I’ve been forced to confront, though, is how equally complicit the US government is/was in ensuring that millions of Jews were allowed to be murdered. PBS has an amazing website that examines Americ and the Holocaust. America does not look good. The State Department was run by a raging lunatic, Breckenridge Long, who intentionally denied visas to desperate Jews seeking a way out. Because of him, over 90% of the immigrations quotas went unfilled in the late 1930s and early 1940s.

Worse, the State Department interfered with reports from Europe detailing how bad the situation was, and intentionally derailed the Bermuda Conference, called by Britain, a nation with some sort of moral conscience and serious concern over the situation. Long is as guilt of mass murder as anyone in Poland. Roosevelt choose to do nothing until almost all of Poland’s Jews were already gassed and cremated. Only increased pressure by Congress – and the Treasury Department’s discovery of the extent of evil actions undertaken the the State Department – caused him to create the (grossly underfunded) War Refugee Board. It saved approximately 200,000 people in a year. Imagine what could have happened if action were taken sooner.

I understand the very complicated nature of the time period. There was a Depression. Popular anti-Semites railed and rallied people across the country, scapegoating Jews for the nation’s problems. But after the war, there was no excuse. However, the US chose to do the wrong thing again.

When I visited Berlin in 1997, I went to the Wannsee Villa Museum. The Wannsee Villa is where the Nazis sat around a table and planned the methodical extermination of Europe’s Jews, gypsies, homosexuals, and other “undesirables.” The Museum’s most chilling exhibit, though, detailed what happened to these men after the war: nothing. The Americans deemed these mass murderers who destroyed thousands of communities crucial to rebuilding Germany. They obtained prominent positions in government and industry, living luxurious lives.

Today, the New York Times reported that it went further than that. A significantly censored report found that “American intelligence officials created a ‘safe haven’ in the United States for Nazis and their collaborators after World War II, and it details decades of clashes, often hidden, with other nations over war criminals here and abroad.” In a way, I am not surprised. The US – far from being a beacon of freedom and hope in many nations in which is props up brutal dictators – has a long history of vile, morally repulsive actions. What this changes, for me, is that I can’t criticize the Polish government for whitewashing its past. I live in a country filled with its own self-righteous hypocritical liars.

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