>I passed by a boutique the other day, and in the window was a fabulous white dress with a unicorn spewing pink squiggly lines out of its horn:

Later, I called to ask how much the dress cost.

"It is $420," the woman replied.

"Oh."

"Shall I check to see if we have it in your size?"

"Um... no, that's OK. Thanks." I hung up fast.

Then Maurice, the hamster who runs on the wheel that powers my brain, fired up his run. Perhaps I could find it online cheaper? I stopped by the store to check out the brand. The unicorn dress is made by a company called Death by Drone. Intriguing...

When I looked it up online, I discovered that the dress I covet is named, "Evil Eye Through the Garden of Suffocation." Now I was a little scared. I also discovered that it is also $420 on the Death by Drone website.

Even if it cute, and even if there is a blazing red jewel in the eye of the unicorn, that seems like a lot of money for a silkscreened cotton dress. But what do I know? Maybe I should splurge and go for it. Right. After that, I can feed my pet unicorn a bowl of gold and we can frolic under rainbows together. Harumph.

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