>Another Monday, another America's Next Top Model Marathon to entertain me while I'm on the treadmill. As I explained to my dad, it is the perfect show to watch while my brain is deprived of oxygen.

Perhaps the oxygen issue led me to decide that I have a future as a model. I realize that there are several barriers to achieving this new career:
-I am too short.
-I am too "fat."
-I am too old.
-I think too much. (The ANTM contestants are always yelled at for this sin.)

These industry biases, however, will not stop me from climbing to the top of a niche: the cheekbone model. Yes, I shall become a cheekbone model. I have excellent bone structure and decent skin in my small face that can be exploited for close shots of cheekbones.

I shall be rich!