>On a crowded bus yesterday, I sat in the seat behind my mom. She repeatedly turned around to talk to me, annoying the woman sitting next to her. Once the bus emptied out a bit, we were able to get seats together.
"That woman sitting next me gave me a dirty look every time I turned to talk to you," my mom said.
"Yeah? Well, she can kiss my ass. If it was such a big deal, she could have offered to switch seats with me so we could sit together."
Mom giggled. "You know what Bubbe always says? 'You can kiss my ass on a Sunday morning.' Know what that means?"
"Well, a lot of very religious Orthodox Jews don't use toilet paper on Saturdays..."
Ha ha ha ha! That Bubbe of mine! What a bad person. Although, I point out, the insult would be even more potent if it was, "Kiss my ass on Saturday at sundown," as that is when the Sabbath technically ends and people can go about their normal routines.