>The tech person at work helped me figure out how to use the chat function on my computer, as the director decreed that this is how we should communicate internally as of this week. I could't find the icon on my desktop, in the right corner at the bottom of my screen, or on the program menu.

"Just click on the balls," Greta said. (The program's icon is two circles.)

"I don't have an balls," I cracked.

After Greta inspected my machine and installed the program, I still had issues. "Greta, my balls don't like to be clicked on," I duky reported.

We snickered. She said that I should watch myself a bit more, though. "The problem is that I can't," I explained. "I'm like the crazy old aunt that no one wants to be seen in public with."

"You're not old enough to be that bad yet."

"I know! I'm so fucked."