>As a Capricorn, my best mates are Cancers. The goat and the crab - a natural pairing if there ever was one. (Incidentally, Husband is a Cancer.) I'm not one who puts much stock in astrology, but I do have many of the personality traits ascribed to my sign. In a way, I'm conservative (not politically of course, but I've never been the type to drink or do drugs or party or have one night stands, etc., not that I care if other people do, but I digress). Stubborn and tenacious, I'll plod along the rocky mountain path eating tin cans until I wind up somewhere with a tasty patch of grass.

Still, it's funny that Cancer is a crab, because I am one of the crabbiest bitches on the planet. At my Saturday research seminar, I wanted to slap some wench who waddled in 30 minutes late for the second week in a row, disrupting the class as she took off her coat, unzipped a back back to take out a notebook, then zipped it back up and unzipped a second backpack and fished around for a pen before zipping that bag up, then shifted around in her chair for a few minutes. Once she was settled, she raised her hand and asked, "Maybe this was covered already, but how do you cite a website as a source?"

"Get a fucking style manual!" I restrained myself from screaming. What the fuck? People, try to show up to class on time (she was the fourth person to waltz in late), and if you can't get your shit together to do so, at least don't open your fucking trap and when you have no idea what we discussed before you deigned to show up. Wait until the damn break or after class and ask then.

I fucking hate people. Cleaning bat guano will be a small price to pay for the refuge of my future cave home. Grrrr...