>When the alarm interrupted my slumber on Friday morning, I was hosting a fundraiser for birth control in Washington, DC. The train to DC left without me, but somehow I managed to get there on time. The catering was entirely ice cream sandwiches and ice cream filled bonbons. I hoovered down little ice cream sandwiches made with the mini chocolate chip cookies that come in those 100 Calorie Packs with chocolate ice cream, I ingested the traditional chocolate rectangle cookies with vanilla, and I inhaled peanut butter cookie ice cream sandwiches with strawberry ice cream. These were chased by the bonbons.

My western omelet sucked extra hard and was a sign of the day to come. I needed a drink more than ever, and I don't even like alcohol. When I finally arrived home, the weight of a crate of granola bars stooped me over. "Mercy!" I cried and ate a Soy Joy bar. It was no ice cream sandwich, but good enough.

If diabetes doesn't eventually kill me, the South Beach cravings will. Tomorrow, I'm not even going to resist. I'm already tasting the pie and cookies. In the meantime, I wonder what I will eat in my sleep tonight.