>Yesterday I had about 500 hits from people looking for Britney Spear’s waxed-but-stubbly beaver. Honestly, it sort of creeps me out. Not to worry, though – no one stayed to read the rest of my rants. It was all wham, bam, thank you for the link ma’am!

On another waxed snatch topic, I decided that while “slit and slat” is still a funny way to describe a Brazilian wax job, I like “snatch and hatch” much better. I already submitted “slit and slat” to UrbanDictionary for consideration, but I shall also go forth with “snatch and hatch.” When I submitted my first suggestion, I also signed up to receive their word of the day. This should bring many fractured gems to my inbox; blood diamonds of a different type, if you will.

As I was telling Husband about my new terms for Brazilian waxing, he reminded me that some time ago I came up with a great new comedy show. It’s about a waxing salon that opens in a war-torn area of the Middle East to help Westernize the women and “empowers” them. Much If set in Palestine, the salon (and show) will be called The Gaza Strip. If set in Iraq, it will be The Sunni Triangle. Side-splitting, is it not? What scares me a bit is that I could almost see a network thinking it would be a good idea, sort of like that awful show about Whoopi Goldberg running a hotel. I forgot what that was called.

Sadly, I myself must face the blade later today. Husband and I are going to his alumni dance tonight. It’s fancy and shit, so I gotta look respectable. That means no tufts of pit hair hanging out of my gown. Fortunately, I don’t have to bother with the wookie-like hair on my legs, as whichever bridesmaid dress I wear (either from Sister’s wedding or Elli’s wedding, depending on which looks less bulgy on me) will be ankle length.

Also, I hope to construct my Victoria’s Secret body double today, but it may need to wait until tomorrow. Either way, hilarious pictures of the process and final product will be shared.

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