>One of the many things that Husband is that we each have an eccentric uncle. Fortunately, mine is related through marriage, but Husband’s oddball uncle is his father’s older brother who I’ll call Uncle Harold. Uncle Harold is known for his hatred of Clinton (at one rare Passover in which he was invited to have dinner with us, he told me that the Clinton arranged for people to be castrated and others to be killed while he was governor of Arkansas), his love of the rag The New York Post (see: hatred of Clinton), and a strange obsession with the ethnicity and religion of sports players and actors (last Passover, his eyes nearly popped out of his head as he gushed about how Melanie Griffith is the best actress ever because she so realistically portrayed Jews in Shining Through and A Stranger Among Us even though she herself is Irish or whatever her ethnic background is.)

Uncle Harold used to insist that when he took early retirement, he would spend his days listening to sports radio, reading his beloved Rupert Murdoch publication, and watching old war movies that he recorded from TV over the last 20 years. Everyone was sure that he’d be bored out of his mind, but that is exactly what he is up to these days and loving every second of it. He is also building an impressive crumb collection in his handlebar mustache, as he no longer bothers bathing on a regular basis. Once in a while, Husband’s uncle sells things on eBay to bring in some extra income and also uses the internet for other entertainment and social interaction.

Thank goodness for the internet, because just as Uncle Harold was evicted from his boarding house in a sketchy neighborhood in a town on Long Island (the building was sold and will no longer be used for housing), he met a woman in a “large ladies” chat room who invited him to live with her in Connecticut. Not to worry, though; she happens to run a boarding house as well, and they agreed that if things don’t work out relationship wise (as they’ve yet to even meet in person), he may still remain as a tenant. Just like her ex-husband, who is also a tenant there.

Oh, the fun to be had!

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