>Given my strong feelings about changing one’s name (see Sunday for Part I's rant), it has taken me a very long time to adjust to the current trend among women my age to eagerly take their husband’s name upon marriage. Almost all of my friends, both male and female, are very progressive, so it surprises me that I know a mere handful of women who didn’t change their name. It just seems weird to me that a woman would invest so much time in her education and work life, building a reputation under an identity and accruing props along the way for her achievements, and then suddenly become someone else. Sure, she’s not really someone else. A rose is a rose by any other name, right? Even dunderheads like me know that. But it is confusing and takes explaining when you walk into someone’s office and call her Dr. Blahblah or what have you, then notice that the medical degree posted on the wall is to Susie Sunshine. Who the fuck is that? The mental reconciliation process kicks in, starting with, “Shit, am I seeing a fraud?” to “Oh, maybe she is using someone else’s office” to finally, “Ah, she’s married. I am in the right place after all.”

Anyway, after beating people over the head with blunt objects in an attempt to force them to respect my choice, I realized that I should back the fuck up when it came to judging my friends’ decisions about what they want to be legally known as. Now I don’t bother getting bent out of shape unless I am reading some article about the new “trend” of women not changing their names (I don’t think at any point in time more married women in the US had their own names than their beloved’s, so I am not sure how this marks a “trend”), which more often than not will site a return to “values” (seems that brazen hussies like me who kept their names don’t have values – who knew?) and the death of the failed feminist experiment. Usually the article includes a quote from some twat to prove that feminism is useless, and she’ll say something brainless like, “If we have the same name, we’ll never get divorced because it will bring us so much closer.” Yeah, I’m sure if Christie Brinkley had insisted that the media refer to her as Mrs. Whatever-her-cheating-husband’s-name-is, he never would have shtupped his teenage intern.

Do what you want about your name, but don’t be a moron, or I will still make fun of you.

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