>I’m back in the infernal city I call home. The plane landed around midnight EST. To encourage people to disembark speedily, I let out a big stinky fart at 12:10. It was mostly ineffective, although the plane’s lights went out for about 15 seconds not long after my blast. I better be damn careful, as the pilot mentioned the temperature while we were taxiing to the gate, and it was 88 degrees. (Let me remind you, this was at midnight!) If my farts are going to cause power outages on planes, I better try not to gas it up this week. I can’t bear not having air conditioning because I accidentally blew out the power grid. (As for global warming, I assume my methane output has only a miniscule, if any, effect.)

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