>When I first read about Snakes on a Plane in Entertainment Weekly several months ago, I was intrigued. As EW noted, it had Samuel L. Jackson and snakes on a plane. What more could a person went in a movie? Nothing, which is why the film already has a zillion fan sites and a backlash against it, although it is not even opening until August. As I was taking a crap in my hotel in Roma (which, incidentally, did not have a super high toilet, nor did any of the other toilets that I used after my first days in Florence), I pondered the film. My two cents:

1. I love Samuel L. Jackson, especially in action movies. They are all great, except ones that co-star Eugene Levy. One of my all-time favorite movies is The Long Kiss Goodnight. It is brilliant. (It is partly brilliant because it also stars Geena Davis, who I adore. Like Samuel L. Jackson, Geena Davis is always awesome, except maybe in non-action dramas, such as her new TV show, Commander in Chief, although I have not watched it, so maybe she is also great in it, too. It just seems annoying. She was super fabulous in The Geena Davis Show, which was overall goddamn hilarious partly due to that bug-eyed kid from Freaks and Geeks who played her stepson. As for the sadly underrated The Long Kiss Goodnight, Jackson and Davis make the best action movie pair ever.)

2. SoaP would probably be better if the studio did not get all excited by the buzz about the film, and decide to tinker with it by having the director add more gore and sexiness. I suspect it will lose some of the cheesy, fun appeal that only a PG-13 movie can have as a result. On the other hand, I am glad that they added the Samuel L. Jackson line, “Get the motherfucking snakes off the motherfucking plane!” As demonstrated time and time again in The Long Kiss Goodnight, Samuel L. Jackson says “motherfucker” 50 billion times better than anyone else in the history of the use of the word “motherfucker.” (Another reason that movie was so great – he must’ve said “motherfucker” in it at least 200 times.) It is worth an R-rating for SoaP as long as Samuel L. Jackson can say “motherfucker.” However, more sex scenes (like a couple getting it on in an airplane bathroom, which I have decided is literally impossible to do given the size and smell of bathrooms on commercial planes – something I have blogged about extensively in the past) and more blood just for an R-rating is stupid and will ruin the integrity of the film. (Yes, I do think that a film about snakes on a plane has integrity, motherfucker!)

Just my two cents here.