>From The Village Voice (“The Mane Attraction” by Rachel Aviv)

…George Michael, the self-described "Tzar of long hair." He was waging a "war on ugliness," lecturing women (the kind who "like lacy underwear") all over the world on how to embrace their femininity. His system for beauty was strict: no bangs, layers, rubber bands, blow drying, or washing more than once a week.

Wow, thanks for the helpful insight on how to be more feminine and less ugly, Mr. Hair Satan. Not usre who appointed you the arbiter of what is attractive, but thank goodness you took the mission seriously. Nothing is more important than a crusade to make all women look and act the same. Variety is an enemy that must be vanquished.

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