Mini Disasters that Add Up to Laughs
Witness arrived in movie theaters when I was nine years old. I thought it looked like one of the scariest movies ever. If memory serves me correctly (and it usually doesn't), it also received complementary reviews as a suspenseful film.
Husband and I watched it on Saturday night. Let me just throw this aphorism out there: Any time there is a 20+ year build up to something, the odds are high that it will disappoint. Damn, that was one crappy movie. The plot makes almost no sense, the action is limited, the score involves some weird synth/organ droning, and there is about as much suspense as watching Jell-O set. Still, Harrison Ford is smoking hot in it. Holy shit, that made the movie almost worth it. (So as not to be sexist, I noticed that Kelly McGillis is gorgeous.)
Then on Sunday, Husband, my friend Sara #1, and I loaded ourselves into Fred the Red, our PT Cruiser, and headed to New Jersey. My goal was to return two shirts that I purchased on Nordstrom online to an actual store so that I could find replacements that fit. As we neared the luxury mall in Paramus, I thought it odd that the parking lot was empty. It was almost 2:00 in the afternoon - prime weekend shopping time. Was the recession really so bad that people didn't even hang out in malls in Jersey any more? Terrifying thought.
My economic fears were soon replaced by annoyance. Husband drove around some orange cones that blocked parts of the parking lot and pulled up to the doors of Nordstrom. "Sundays: Closed," I read aloud. So the whole freaking mall was closed. How fucking un-American is it to close a mall on Sunday? Seriously! We tried another nearby mall, only to find it closed as well. That's when we realized that Paramus, NJ is the most unpatriotic town in the US: no retail stores are open on Sundays, which we assumed is by law. The horror! The horror!
Labels: Damn, fuck, fun trips that are not fun anymore, mortification, What is wrong with people?
posted by Suzanne @ 7:45 AM
and I'm more than delighted to send some your way. Spread (ha ha!) the word!
11 Comments:
actually, until i was in my teens nothing except for maybe gas stations were open on sundays in north dakota. there was a huge debate over whether anything should be open at all on sundays, but they finally compromised with noon opening times on sundays. whew! what conflict!
I totally remember places not being open on Sundays when I was a kid. But by the time I was 10 or 11, it was definitely unusual if a place didn't open on Sunday. I guess in this case I was taken aback because it's suburban New Jersey, which is known for its mall culture.
That shit would not fly down here in Philly. Next time make the hike down to King of Prussia!
Is it a new policy or an old one? Not sure how things are on your side of the Atlantic, but over here a lot of stores and restaurants are adopting more limited hours because the drop in business means they can't afford the staff.
Also, I have to say I wish fewer things were open 7 days a week. I've been/lived in a few places where nothing is open on Sundays other than the odd bodega or gas station, and it somehow makes me happy that everyone gets a day off. It's annoying at first if you're used to 24/7 convenience, but you get used to it. Sucks that you had to trek all the way out to NJ though.
Yeah, it's a Bergen County thing. I learned of it years ago and am still appalled.
King of Prussia is indeed an awesome and almighty mall. But it's much further than Short Hills, and I think it is lacking a Nordstrom.
I'm just shocked that such a policy still exists in suburban Jersey. I agree that it is sort of nice to not have stores open every day, to give people time off, but I don't know if anyone can afford it at this point.
I think there is a Nordstom at KoP. We should take a trip there again soon! I remember being really pissed when we'd go to the Jersey Shore for the weekend when I was a kid and a lot of stores would be closed. Thankfully, this has been remedied.
-Steph
My mom lives near there (likely literally next door) so ifyou had asked I could have told you. ;-)
I would have been completely surprised too. A mall?
It's a super old "blue" law. Blue laws restrict certain activities on Sunday, to accommodate the Christian sabbath) Which will only be overturned by those who inhabit Bergen County. Those who live there LOVE the fact that the stores are closed on Sundays making it a "traffic free" zone. However, they fail to realize that if they were open on Sunday, the traffic on Saturday would not be nearly as bad dissipating it over the course of two days.
Probably a Blue Law which have been stricken as unconstitutional although you will still find areas where a strong and loud church has forced the law anyway.
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