Don't Do It
There are few things more depressing than trying on a bathing suit.
I'm just saying.
Labels: (undeserved) self-pity
posted by Suzanne @ 11:30 PM
Saturday, July 14, 2007
I'm just saying.
About Me
- Name: Suzanne Reisman
- Location: New York, NY
I'm a misanthropic humanist. While I'm a do-gooder by training and profession, I sort of also loathe people. Now I write, too.
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Previous Posts
- Poking the Poconos
- Resistance is Futile
- Staten Island: A Borough from Another Planet
- I Think Those are Mine
- Laundry Room Crotch Eating
- Hell is Just Around the Corner, I Think
- Brilliance: $2.99 (plus tax)
- Die, Evil Trends! Die Already!
- Suzanne and Husband as Simpsons 'Toons
- Conundrum
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- confessions of a middle-aged suburban diva
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- Count Mockula's Naughty Bits
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Magazine and Newspaper Articles:
- "Ending illegal occupation of America," Metro New York, May 7, 2007
- "Summer Journeys: 5 Amazing Destinations Around the Country," New York Family, April 2007
- "Welcome to the Neighborhood," New York Family, March 2007
- "Evolution Makeover," New York Family, March 2007
- "Working for NYC's Youngest: Child Care at a Turning Point," City Limits Weekly, March 5, 2007
- "Building for the Future of Early Childhood Education," New York Nonprofit Press, February 2007
- Breast Cancer for Fun and Profit, The Panelist
- "Time to bring Roe home," Metro New York, Jan. 22, 2006
- "Porn: It just might cure what ails us," Metro New York, Nov. 16, 2006
- "I'll never be a Mrs. Husband," Metro New York, Oct. 24, 2006
10 Comments:
I made my husband go with me one year. He needed to experience to understand. Now he gives me the whole weekend, cheerily takes over parental duties, and palms me a Xanax as I head out the door.
A good man.
I ordered a Speedo through Amazon. When you order online, you can specify the cut of the leg -- so your thigh bangs don't show. And it was relatively inexpensive. I recommend. I ordered one size bigger than I hoped I needed and it was perfect.
I agree. I am in denial about the state of my ass fat. I will be in San Diego next week and our B&B has a pool and I love swimming but dreading the bathing suit part.
I once went out drinking before trying on swimsuits! I hate swimsuits- I don't even wear shorts or tank tops out of the house, why would I want my butt on display just to go swimming? I just ordered a new suit from this place- not only will my butt be covered, but I won't even have to shave all the way up! I ordered these shorts with this top. I'm so excited for it to arrive!
I haven't tried on a swimsuit in years. I think I still have my professional-swim-racer Speedo somewhere. Why do I have a professional swimsuit instead of a designer one with a cute pattern and shows off my boobs? Because it's so much easier.
Can I join the self-loathing party? Try bathing suit shopping 6 months after having a baby, for a destination wedding at which all the other people were thinner than you BEFORE you got pregnant. And before anyone says 'but you had a baby so you have an excuse' let me assure you that makes no difference whatsoever in the cold light of the changing room . . .
Hey! Knock it off, you guys! First of all, Suzanne, I've met you, and you're cute as all get-out, and I suspect you look fantastic in a bathing suit. I've also seen duct-tape Suzanne, so I'm coming at this from more than one angle.
And Des? You have mucho pictures on MySpace, and I KNOW you're adorable!
Everybody else -- stop the insanity! Embrace your wonderful selves and your wonderful bodies! Bathing suits are for swimming around in, not for making you feel awful about yourself. I'm hunting you all down and giving you hugs. And a cookie.
Here, here Count Mockula!!!!
That's why the Count rocks.
I weigh 205 pounds at the moment. I own a bathing suit that I bought by basically going,"Ummmmm...that one?" They had it in my size, it wasn't ugly, I bought it. When my son wants to go swimming I throw it on and me and my fat butt walk proudly through the trailer court. Ahhhh, the life I live!
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