Laziness Pays

New York City is enveloped in sauna steam. Everywhere I go, I must use my mental machete to cut paths through the heavy air. Buckets of sweat ooze from me. If anyone had the urge to interview me for a news program, I would certainly not agree to do it outside. Even if I didn't wear sunglasses, my sweatiness would make me look guilty.

Tuesday night I sat around my apartment reminding myself that I should shave my legs and pits so that I could wear a cute navy sleeveless dress with beige stitching to my big meeting at work in the morning. Hours later, I still had not touched either my razor or my electric depilatory machine thing that removes hair with dozens of rotating tweezers that supposedly yank hairs out by the root so I needn't bother with shaving again for weeks, but it never lasts longer than a few days. Pants and a blouse were thus donned Wednesday morning.

My laziness wound up to be beneficial, as a few minutes into the meeting, a woman wearing the exact dress I had planned to wear waltzed into the room. I breathed a sigh of relief. How awful would it have been if there were two of us in the same dress?!?! You know how women are; the whole meeting would have bombed, and thousands New York City's children would continue to be deprived of quality child care. Ha.

At the end of the successful session, I approached my middle-aged wardrobe twin.

"My laziness prevented us from an awkward situation," I began and told my tale.

She laughed. "Well, there aren't too many options for us petite women out there. I have a colleague who has all the clothes I do. When I know we have a meeting, I make sure I don't wear anything from Ann Taylor."

Now I know that we will pull off the new child care system. People with such extensive planning skills can achieve anything.